July 23, 2010

The right kind of free time

Despite the craziness of life with a 3 month old, 4 year old and living with my family, I've found myself with more hobby-ish things to do. My only consistent hobby over the years has been reading. A year and a half ago I added knitting, but I haven't been able to do that for a few months because of pregnancy-related carpal tunnel in my wrists and hands and the up and down, no more than 2 minutes to concentrate nature of mothering. But as I've made more decisions to write and focus on certain things in my life, I actually have stuff waiting to be done (that aren't chores).

With my free moments lately I've been able to blog, work on different writing projects, keep up with the journals I'm making for each of the boys and, of course, read. I'm quite happy with this. I don't like being bored. And even though I'm pretty self-motivating I tend to be more lazy when I have too much free time. As I have more that is required of me, I think I get more productive. I remember that some of the happiest times in my life have been the busiest and/or craziest. When I was in my last year of college, my life was pretty insane. Full, tough schedule at school, 2 jobs working 25-30 hours a week, an apartment to take care of, church responsibilities, a husband, etc. However, because I was doing something I loved and cared about in pursuing my degree, I felt quite fulfilled much of the time.

In August I will begin a part time (20 hours a week) job at my alma mater, working for the professor I worked for as a work/study student. I'll be the Office Manager for the Honors Department. I'm am very excited about this, but also quite nervous. Having an outside, more cerebral outlet for myself is appealing, and something that I have yearned for since becoming a stay-at-home mom. It is very important for me to raise my children primarily myself, but I struggle a great deal with the lifestyle. This job will be flexible and hopefully not overly taxing. Jim will be able to do most of the baby-sitting of the kids so we won't have to spend much or any money for childcare. The extra pressure on my time will, I hope, make me more productive at home because I won't have too much undefined time. At least, that is my hope and prayer. There is a part of me that is still nervous about leaving my kids and adding another responsibility to my life. It's new territory and I hope its exploration is exciting and invigorating, rather than draining and overwhelming!

2 comments:

  1. Starting anything new always seems to come with an adjustment period. But I see good things in store for you with this. I feel excited for you and hope that it gives you a sense of individual fulfillment outside of home which will then give you more of a satisfaction at home as well. A win-win...that's what I hope the experience will be for you. Blessings.

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  2. So you are starting from Aug... I am starting new one on Sept. Whatever the new situation is, even for me, the unknowing situation always makes me nervous. So I can't imagine how big deal it is for you to put yourself into total different responsibility. You've been always like that to take a step into new world... having family and having family then three different responsibilities; wife, mother and a worker! For me two is more than enough for now a day. I pray and know you always overcome whatever comes in front of you!

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